Auburn jokes; Let's hear 'em

[2Stater]

Q: How do you keep Auburn Tigers out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.

Q: What do Auburn University Tigers Football players always get on their final exams?
A: Drool.

Q: What's the biggest lie told at Auburn University?
A: "I was just helping that sheep over the fence."

Q: What’s the difference between a litter of puppies and Auburn University Tigers fans?
A: Eventually puppies grow up and stop whining.

Q: How many Auburn University Tigers does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up.

Q: What do Tigers cheerleaders and Tigers quarterbacks have in common?
A: They're always on their backs.

 

[N.AL-Tider]

[Chechem]

How can you tell there's been an Aub in your backyard?



 

 

Your garbage is gone, and your dog's pregnant.

[2Stater]

Q: Why do Auburn Cheerleaders wear panties?
A: To keep their ankles warm.

Q: What do you call 47 football fans around a TV watching all the Bowl Games?
A: The Auburn Tigers.

Q: What do the Auburn Tigers and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 75,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".

Q: Did you hear about the Aubies found frozen in a car at the drive-in movie in January?
A: They went to see "Closed for Winter".

[N.AL-Tider]

Two Auburn football players drowned when the truck they were riding in ran off the road and into a lake.  Witnesses said they could see them trying furiously to get out but died trying to open the tailgate...

[2Stater]

[Catch Prothro]

Then there was the one about the Auburn fan who locked it keys in his car.  It took his buddies 4 hours to get him out.

[carl childers]

Why do all trees in our state lean to the east?

Because Auburn sucks.

[td57]

Sad news from the Barn this weekend. Awbren homecoming queen, Betsy the Holstein, passed away suddenly. She was found early Sunday morning laying by a stump after celebrating her homecoming win Saturday night.
On Monday morning fusball coach Gus the Bus Malzan sent three offensive linemen out to bury Betsy. Late Monday night the players came dragging in worn out and filthy nasty. Coach Gussy commenced to chewing they out for taking so long to bury one cow.
The players explained “but croach….we hasd to dig up 3 holes before wez could bury Betsy. Coach Gussy asked “why in the world you had to dig three holes?” The players explained again “well croach….the first 2 weren’t big enough.”

[bamalum67]

One from my days at the U..

back long ago, the barn had a hot running back, AMer Indian by the name of Eagle. dumb as a stump. failed an exam and was susp from football. Coarch said we gotta have Eagle to beat Bama. Prof said well, I will let him take an exam, but it will be 12:00 SAt. Game time was to be 2:00. Maybe he can get through in time to play.

Eagle is slaving away on his exam, game starts, Bama is beating the dogcrap outta the barn..no Eagle..

A murmur goes up from the crowd.....

"Whar Eagle?  Whar Eagle? Whar Eagle?

And that kiddies, was the start of the legend!

[ALTideUp]

Two Aubarn fans watching the pre-game warm ups before the jawga game. And there's old Ugga out on the field, without a care in the world, licking his balls. One of the Aubies say, "Man. I wish I could do that". The other says, "He bite you".

[Catch Prothro]

Two Aubarn fans watching the pre-game warm ups before the jawga game. And there's old Ugga out on the field, without a care in the world, licking his balls. One of the Aubies say, "Man. I wish I could do that". The other says, "He bite you".

[Marshal Dillon]

Auburn jokes:

Gene Chiznik
Tuberville
T. Bowden
Sociology Department
Auburn Academics


 

[Catch Prothro]

Q: How do you keep Auburn Tigers out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.

Q: How many Auburn University Tigers does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up.

[Chechem]

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