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Author Topic: ***The Official CRS Joke Thread***  (Read 218516 times)
XBAMA
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« Reply #30 on: November 17, 2018, 09:49:43 PM »
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God And Guns got us here and God and Guns will keep us here
Catch Prothro
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« Reply #31 on: November 22, 2018, 09:14:49 AM »
Quote from: XBAMA on November 17, 2018, 09:49:43 PM
(Blonde Joke)
Laughing Laughing
« Last Edit: November 22, 2018, 09:18:52 AM by Catch Prothro » Logged
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« Reply #32 on: November 22, 2018, 09:28:42 AM »
A man is dying and calls his priest, his doctor, and his lawyer to his house. 

"They say you can't take it with you, but I'm going to try," says the man.

So he hands each one of them an envelope containing $200K in cash.

"When I die, I want you to drop these envelopes into my casket," says the man.

A month later, the man dies, and at the funeral each of the three friends drops their envelopes into the casket.

Later, they are sitting at a bar, reminiscing about the man.  Finally, the priest can't hold back any longer.

"I feel so guilty," says the priest.  "I took $20K out of the envelope for the orphan's food fund. "

The doctor looks at him, turns red, and says, "Father, now you're making me feel bad.  I took $100k out of the envelope to buy myself a Mercedes."

The lawyer looks at the priest, looks at the doctor, and shakes his head in disgust.  "You two should feel ashamed of yourselves," says the lawyer, "I put in a check for the full amount."
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2Stater
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« Reply #33 on: November 23, 2018, 08:09:48 AM »
Quote from: Catch Prothro on November 22, 2018, 09:28:42 AM
A man is dying and calls his priest, his doctor, and his lawyer to his house. 

"They say you can't take it with you, but I'm going to try," says the man.

So he hands each one of them an envelope containing $200K in cash.

"When I die, I want you to drop these envelopes into my casket," says the man.

A month later, the man dies, and at the funeral each of the three friends drops their envelopes into the casket.

Later, they are sitting at a bar, reminiscing about the man.  Finally, the priest can't hold back any longer.

"I feel so guilty," says the priest.  "I took $20K out of the envelope for the orphan's food fund. "

The doctor looks at him, turns red, and says, "Father, now you're making me feel bad.  I took $100k out of the envelope to buy myself a Mercedes."

The lawyer looks at the priest, looks at the doctor, and shakes his head in disgust.  "You two should feel ashamed of yourselves," says the lawyer, "I put in a check for the full amount."

 Laughing If WV was still alive, he'd be giving you he!! right now. 
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XBAMA
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« Reply #34 on: November 23, 2018, 04:37:46 PM »
Quote from: 2Stater on November 23, 2018, 08:09:48 AM


 Laughing If WV was still alive, he'd be giving you he!! right now. 


good info there boys , HTH   
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2Stater
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« Reply #35 on: November 25, 2018, 12:00:11 PM »
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cbbama99
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« Reply #36 on: November 29, 2018, 09:44:25 AM »
A wife wakes here husband up in the middle of the night. "Hey, if I ever died, would you re-marry?"
"Probably so."
"Ok. Would you live in this house with her?"
"Well sure. Why go buy another house just because I remarried?"
"Would you let her wear my clothes?"
"I suppose she could if she was your size."
"Would you let her drive my car?"
"No!! Absolutely not!"
"Why not?"
"She can't drive a straight stick."
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SUPERCOACH
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« Reply #37 on: November 29, 2018, 10:03:29 AM »
Quote from: cbbama99 on November 29, 2018, 09:44:25 AM
A wife wakes here husband up in the middle of the night. "Hey, if I ever died, would you re-marry?"
"Probably so."
"Ok. Would you live in this house with her?"
"Well sure. Why go buy another house just because I remarried?"
"Would you let her wear my clothes?"
"I suppose she could if she was your size."
"Would you let her drive my car?"
"No!! Absolutely not!"
"Why not?"
"She can't drive a straight stick."

  Not so hypothetical now is it? 
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2Stater
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« Reply #38 on: November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM »
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.
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ricky023
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« Reply #39 on: November 29, 2018, 11:02:13 AM »
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.


Wow are those cashiers graduates from auburn? RTR!
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2Stater
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« Reply #40 on: November 29, 2018, 11:30:31 AM »
Quote from: ricky023 on November 29, 2018, 11:02:13 AM
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.


Wow are those cashiers graduates from auburn? RTR!

 Laughing Yes. They graduated with a degree in Wal-Marks-ology.
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Chechem
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« Reply #41 on: November 29, 2018, 11:31:09 AM »
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 11:30:31 AM
Quote from: ricky023 on November 29, 2018, 11:02:13 AM
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.
Wow are those cashiers graduates from auburn? RTR!
Laughing Yes. They graduated with a degree in Wal-Marks-ology.
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Hannibal Lecter, MD
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« Reply #42 on: November 29, 2018, 11:34:25 AM »
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 11:30:31 AM
Quote from: ricky023 on November 29, 2018, 11:02:13 AM
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.


Wow are those cashiers graduates from auburn? RTR!

 Laughing Yes. They graduated with a degree in Wal-Marks-ology.

I bet they really keep their lines mooooving.

My apologies for the udderly terrible joke.
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2Stater
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« Reply #43 on: November 29, 2018, 11:43:08 AM »
Quote from: Hannibal Lecter, MD on November 29, 2018, 11:34:25 AM
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 11:30:31 AM
Quote from: ricky023 on November 29, 2018, 11:02:13 AM
Quote from: 2Stater on November 29, 2018, 10:59:18 AM
Walmart is closing 269 stores in 2019 putting 14 cashier's out of work.


Wow are those cashiers graduates from auburn? RTR!

 Laughing Yes. They graduated with a degree in Wal-Marks-ology.

I bet they really keep their lines mooooving.

My apologies for the udderly terrible joke.

Is that the Bessie you can do? 
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N.AL-Tider
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« Reply #44 on: November 29, 2018, 11:49:04 AM »
Funny jokes and puns guys.  Thanks, I needed that...
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"Play by play, that’s how we win here."

Eddie Jackson  Dec. 2016
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